If you’ve ever tried to parallel park in front of an audience or explain TikTok to your board members, you know what it feels like to be under pressure. But here’s the truth: sometimes the best leadership advice is as simple as Rule #6—don’t take yourself so dang seriously!
It might sound like something you’d hear at a backyard barbecue, but this lighthearted mantra packs profound wisdom, especially for nonprofit leaders navigating change. During times of uncertainty, the weight can feel especially heavy. In moments like these, I’ve found guidance in an unexpected place: The Art of Possibility by Benjamin and Rosamund Zander, particularly its simple yet profound Rule #6. This is one of our core principles when facilitating teams and groups.
Recently, we saw Rule #6 in action during a tense merger negotiation. The room was thick with stress as we dissected every detail for hours. Then, right when we were about to spiral back into the same arguments, someone blurted out, “GETMO!”
We all stared. “Good Enough To Move On,” he explained, grinning. It was like someone had let the air out of a balloon. Laughter rippled through the room, and just like that, we stopped rehashing old issues and finally made progress.
Rule #6 works because it reminds us to embrace perspective, lighten up, and focus on what really matters. So next time you’re under pressure, remember: a little humor can shift the whole room—and your mindset.
Let’s explore how applying this rule can foster resilience and inspire your team through times of transition.
Why We Take Ourselves Too Seriously
It’s easy to see why leadership can feel serious. Nonprofits operate in a high-stakes environment where resources are often stretched thin, and every decision can impact vulnerable communities. The responsibility is real, but internalizing this weight can manifest as stress, rigidity, and a tendency to overcontrol. We may become overly invested in our importance or fear making mistakes, which stifles creativity and connection.
Rule #6 reminds us that taking ourselves too seriously doesn’t make us better leaders—it just makes us more burdened. When we let go of self-importance, we create space for collaboration, innovation, and authenticity.
We’re NOT the Center of the Universe
A core element of Rule #6 is perspective. It’s about recognizing that while our roles are significant, they’re part of a larger whole. In the Zanders’ words, we’re not the center of the universe; we’re contributors to a broader mission. This realization frees us from the pressure of perfection and allows us to lead more effectively.
Practical Insight:
When you’re in the thick of transition, take a step back. Ask yourself:
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- What story am I creating about this challenge, and how can I let go of the unnecessary weight?
- How can I reconnect with the mission rather than getting caught up in my own worries?
This shift doesn’t diminish your impact; it amplifies it. By seeing yourself as part of a collective effort, you invite others to step up, share ideas, and contribute their strengths.
The Power of Levity and Humor
One of the most powerful tools in any leader’s toolkit is levity. Humor and humility can transform tension into connection and fear into possibility. When you model this, you create an environment where your team feels safe to take risks and learn from mistakes.
Example:
Think of a time when things didn’t go according to plan—a failed fundraiser, a missed deadline, or a tough board meeting. How did you respond? By acknowledging the challenges with a sense of humor and perspective, you not only diffuse tension but also show your team that setbacks are part of the journey.
Action Step:
In your next team meeting, encourage a moment of levity. Share a story of a mistake and what it taught you. By being vulnerable, you demonstrate that it’s okay to be human and that growth often comes from messy, imperfect moments.
Leading by Example: Bringing Rule #6 to Your Team
As nonprofit leaders, our teams look to us for direction, especially during uncertain times. By embodying Rule #6, you set a tone of openness, resilience, and possibility. Here’s how:
1. Invite Playfulness:
Create opportunities for creativity and play, even in serious discussions. Brainstorming sessions or strategic planning meetings can benefit from moments of lightheartedness that spark fresh ideas.
2. Cultivate Calm:
Create room for your team to feel comfortable taking risks and learning from mistakes. When people feel at ease, they’re more likely to share bold ideas and take initiative.
3. Model Self-Compassion:
When you show kindness to yourself, you give your team permission to do the same. Acknowledge challenges without harsh self-criticism, and celebrate progress, no matter how small.
Final Thoughts: The Bigger Picture
Rule #6 doesn’t mean we care less—it means we care smarter. By stepping back from our self-imposed seriousness, we invite immediate calm, allowing us to reconnect with the passion that brought us to this work in the first place. We lead not from fear or ego but from a place of authenticity and possibility.
So, the next time you feel the weight of uncertainty pressing down, pause. Take a deep breath. Find a moment of lightness. Remind yourself and your team that you’re all in this together, navigating important work that transcends any single moment or challenge.
In the words of Benjamin Zander, “It’s all invented anyway.” Let’s invent a story of leadership that’s calm, resilient, and full of hope and possibility.
