February has a way of telling the truth.
The adrenaline of January has worn off. Plans are set. Meetings are happening. And patterns you hoped might change on their own are, well, still there.
Here’s something I’ve been noticing lately, and judging by the number of nodding heads I’ve seen on recent calls, I suspect I’m not alone.
Many of the nonprofit leaders I work with hold deep convictions that often brought them into this sector in the first place. Conviction keeps you going when the work is hard. It gives you the backbone to say “no” when waffling would be easier.
Conviction is a good thing.
But where there are pros, there will always be cons. Conviction is no exception.
The Cost of Certainty
Conviction can be propulsive, but it can also shut down conversation. Once a belief hardens—something like “I hate fundraising,” “this board will never do that,” or “we tried that already”—the room often slips into what I call “download mode.”
New information and interesting ideas may enter the dialogue, but they just sit there. No one picks them up. No one turns them over. No one asks what else might be possible.
Conviction has a way of creating sacred cows: ideas that feel untouchable. Questioning them can feel less like a strategy and more like a values violation. I’ve seen this happen in organizations that tackle challenging issues (think homelessness, mental health, education, for example). Over time, routine decisions get wrapped up in history, identity, and virtue.
Trying something new can feel like betraying what you stand for. The irony, of course, is that many of those convictions were once brave experiments themselves.
Enter curiosity.
Compared to the fierce dialectics of conviction battling conviction, curiosity offers a gentler slope into dialogue. Curiosity sounds like, hmmm, that’s interesting, instead of here’s why that won’t work.
It creates space for learning. For seeing around corners. And on many leadership teams, it’s an underused muscle.
Curiosity alone doesn’t get things done. I’ve seen organizations drowning in endless exploration because leaders hesitate to shut down even one idea. Every question leads to another, and decisions are perpetually deferred in the name of staying “open.”
Which is why I don’t think the answer is choosing curiosity or conviction. The real leadership work is discernment: knowing which tool to pull out when.
Some moments demand conviction. A clear line in the sand—during a crisis, for example, or when making a bold bet.
Other moments desperately need curiosity, especially when there are many sides of a situation to explore.
Building the Muscle
Strengthening that discernment muscle often starts with identity.
James Clear writes that change rarely sticks at the activity level alone. It takes hold when it reaches the identity level. His question is simple: “Am I the kind of person who would do this?”
I’d extend that to leadership teams:
- Are we the kind of leaders who can be genuinely curious?
- Are we the kind who can hold conviction without a white-knuckle grip?
Seth Godin asks his own version: “What does it sound like when you change your mind?” I’d offer another iteration: “What does it feel like?” In too many organizations, the honest answer is risky.
Make it Safe to Change Your Mind
One of the most practical shifts I’ve seen is creating explicit signals that it’s safe to be vulnerable, get things wrong, and learn in public. Which conversations are exploratory, and which are for decision-making? When that distinction is fuzzy, curiosity can feel dangerous, and conviction can feel premature.
Which brings me to meetings (those lovable time vacuums).
One simple, powerful practice is to name the purpose of the conversation upfront. Brand the meeting by intent:
This is a brainstorming meeting. Curiosity is the star of the show.
This is an exploration meeting. We’re pressure-testing assumptions. Let’s change our minds.
This is a decision-making meeting. Be prepared to make your case.
When people know the kind of conversation they’re in, they show up differently.
A Few Questions to Chew On
If you’re looking for a place to start, consider bringing one of these into your next meeting:
- Are we the kind of leaders who can change our minds?
- Where are the sacred cows hiding in our organization? Which convictions feel uncomfortable to question?
- What belief once served us well but may now be due for re-examination?
Conviction and curiosity are companions. The art of leadership is knowing when to let one take the lead and when to invite the other back in.
Until next time,
Kimberley
